Archive for the month “January, 2013”

Life Is Constant Learning

Let’s say you have decided to make a major life change in order to lead a happier and more satisfied life. You quit your job and move to the country. You are following your dream of growing your own fruits and vegetables to sustain your family, as well as to sell at the local market.


It’s been a stressful time. Big changes always are. You constantly doubt yourself and question if you did the right thing. You are taking all the steps you can think of to make your dream a reality. You have made a plan and you are going to see it through, weeds and all.


You know relatively little about growing produce on a larger scale, but are willing to learn. You have found a mentor and are working with them to grow your first crops. You are taking agricultural courses to increase your knowledge.


Now you are starting to feel good about your decision to change, and are more confident in your abilities as a farmer. Your first crops are planted; you tend them daily, and are anxiously awaiting your first harvest.


But nothing grows.


You water, weed and fertilize. You consult with your mentor and do research on the internet.


And still nothing grows.


Your doubts creep back in to your mind and your stress levels increase. What have I done? How could I have been so arrogant as to think I could make this happen? Why did I do this?


You begin to believe you have failed, but you couldn’t be more wrong.


When you take that first brave step into the great unknown, you have to remember 2 very important things: you had the courage to take the step in the first place, and it’s called the ‘unknown’ for a reason.


Even when you think you have planned for every contingency, covered every angle, and imagined every outcome, the world will still throw some surprises your way. How you handle these new challenges is what will make the difference along your path to achieving your goal.


When things go wrong, or not how you expected, always ask yourself ‘What can I learn from this?’. This is not the time to quit or give up on your dream.

In the example of trying to grow your own produce, you may learn:

This job requires patience.

Nature is complicated.

The soil needed better preparation.

You need to gain more experience and knowledge.


Every day we learn in more subtle ways, from activities as simple as a paper cut. It stings, and you would prefer not to have it happen again. You should be more careful next time. Life constantly tries to teach us knew things and provide us with new experiences. Actually applying those learnings is the key to success.


Be patient. Accept that nature has its own plan. Learn to prepare the soil properly. Help at another farm to gain experience. Be more careful when handling paper documents.


Think about the obstacles you are learning from on your journey to a more fulfilled life. Always be looking for ways to learn and grow. Be kind to yourself as you are your own worst critic. Sometimes the most important learning will be the realization that you are on the wrong path and need to take a different fork in the road.

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If Money Didn’t Matter

What did you want to be when you grew up? An astronaut? A nurse? A carnival clown? An explorer? A parent?


Remember when you were a child and you could imagine your future career in whatever field you wanted? Of course, that was back when you didn’t have the responsibilities you do today: keeping a roof over your head, food on the table, and generally paying the bills. Money didn’t matter.


It’s possible that what appealed to you when you were younger, does not appeal to you today. Being a biologist might have sounded cool when you were 8 years old, but once you took biology class and dissected your first frog, you may have decided it wasn’t really for you.


Are you working in the field you dreamed of? Maybe you are still working toward that goal. If not, why not? Unfortunately, ‘money’ is all too often the quick answer to that question. But this should not be the end of the conversation.


If you absolutely love your current job, that’s fantastic! Congratulations! If you don’t love your work, would you consider a change?


If money didn’t matter, what would you do with your life? Have a thought about that for a few minutes.


Perhaps you would be a rodeo cowboy. Now, are you going to quit your current job and head for the rodeo circuit tomorrow? Not likely. Is your dream profession something you could work towards by taking classes? Is it possible that you could compete in rodeo events on your days off from your regular job? Explore your options.


Maybe you determine that becoming a rodeo cowboy is not at all realistic. Take a moment to consider what about the role appeals to you. It could be something simple like working with animals or the adrenaline rush. Do you have those elements in your current job? Are there other jobs you could take where you could incorporate those elements?


Perhaps if money didn’t matter, you would donate your time to working with charitable organizations. You could start working on that dream very easily by helping out a few hours a month at a local food bank or donation centre. Make your dreams a priority in your own life.


When you were a child, perhaps you dreamed of being a ballerina. You could still become a ballerina today. Becoming a ballerina does not necessarily mean you must perform on the world stage. You could take ballet classes and perform in local productions. When looking at the elements of being a ballerina, you may find you just want to dance or perform. You could try other forms of dance, or even try acting.


Make some time over the next few days to think about what you wanted to be when you grew up, what you dreamed was your perfect job, and what you would do with your life if money didn’t matter. All of these questions will help you hone in on what changes you could make to help you live a more satisfied and happier life.


What childhood dreams are you pursuing? If the answer is none, why aren’t you? Start today!

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Get A Hobby

Our lives aren’t easy. We don’t get what we deserve every time. Opportunity ditches us, destiny plays hide and seek. Then negative thoughts creep in which, if allowed to stay for a while, turn into depression. Depression is one of the worst feelings to have. It surrounds us like a cocoon and suddenly we can’t feel the happiness, the excitement, and the blessings of life. Depression takes away our better judgment, makes us its slaves. Many of the accidental criminal incidents are actually caused by depressed people. Basically depression takes from us our lives and changes us into some different person we would never like to become. That’s why it is so important to get over depression; keep it out if possible.

As I mentioned earlier, depression comes from excessive negative thinking. So if you want to keep out depression you have to stop thinking negatively. Normally, we think negatively when nothing goes right in your lives. But in the time of problems, it is most important to think positively so that you could change your situation. In most cases, we don’t have much work to do in the troublesome times and a lot of time to spare and think negative craps. That’s why the best way to stop negative thinking is to cut the time for thinking. Do something. Get busy. You can always pick a hobby!

Hobbies are really great for your mental health. Hobbies give you joy and there’s always one thing or another to do when you have a hobby, which gives less time to think negative craps. You can have a pet or two. Get a dog or a cat may be. Get some birds if you love their vibrant colors and melodious chirping. Or perhaps you could commit to a community service as a hobby. Read to the elderly. Or you could pick something you love to do to kill your extra time. Cook, paint, do gardening. Be innovative.

When you commit to a hobby not only it keeps you busy but it uses some of your energy like exercises do. And it is always helpful for your mind if you have a sound body. And when you keep yourself busy, you wouldn’t even notice how quickly time will pass and everything will be normal again.

Things to remember:

  1. Pick a hobby according to your choice. Something that you’ll love to do.
  2. When you have a hobby, commit to it one hundred percent.
  3. If you decide to have pets then make sure you learn everything about how to take care of them. You can’t neglect them even for a short period of time, be sure of that.
  4. It’s great if you can convert your hobby to a source of income, doesn’t matter how little that is. For example, you can sell the birds if you have cage bird breeding as your hobby.


Try a hobby. It feels great and moreover it keeps depression well away. And a life without depression, without negative thoughts is bliss.

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The Art Of Forgiving

Everyone has a mortal enemy list. No matter how much you deny it, there are persons who piss you off even with their presence. There are persons you hate more than anything. There are persons you wish you had never met. But the problem is, you can’t undo the past and no matter what you do, you can’t reverse time and erase the reason for your hatred. So you are stuck with your hatred. You have to bear your hatred all your life. Or do you?

Hating somebody is like a heavy burden to your heart. It is painful. What sucks even more is that, the person you hate, most of the times; don’t give a damn about your hatred. Your hatred affects nobody but you. By hating somebody you give them more chance to hurt you again and again.

Your hatred can be justified. Let’s say, the people you hate deserve to be hated. Some of them have broken your heart, your trust and hurt you beyond your imagination. You are right, and they do deserve to be hated. But is it worth it if the hatred hurts only you? You have to let go your grudge. You must learn to forgive to bring peace to your mind.

Forgiving is a practice. It is not easy to forgive someone in the true sense. But it makes life so much easier. You can follow some steps which will help you forgive someone.

Steps of forgiving:

  1. Remember that the person who has wronged you is also subjected to errors. He/she made a terrible mistake but that doesn’t mean that he/she can’t be forgiven.
  2. Try to judge if your hatred is fully justified. May be there is another part of the story you don’t know. May be the person isn’t so bad after all. He/ she just made a bad decision.
  3. If someone indeed deserves your hatred, then that person definitely doesn’t deserve to be remembered. As long as you hate him, you can’t forget him. So forgive and forget.
  4. You forgive somebody doesn’t mean that you support their action or you forget what they did to you. You just accept the fact that they are not as perfect as you wished them to be.
  5. You remember that by forgiving someone you are not doing a favor to them. You are doing this for yourself.

Forgiving is the first step of moving on. Wounds heal when you move on. So let’s just forgive those silly little persons who never understood your worth and hurt you. In the end, it’s their loss that they don’t have such a wonderful person as you in their lives.

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Just Be Yourself

It’s funny how people always keep advising us on being ourselves. How can we ever be someone else? Whatever we do, we are always going to ourselves, right? As strange as it might sound but the truth is, it is possible to be someone else. Not in the physical sense but you can become a carbon copy of someone else in your attitude, your beliefs and your actions. Now you can ask if being someone else is a bad thing. There are loads of great and successful persons out there and how come it’s a bad thing wanting to be like them? In your answer let me as you something. Why do you want to be like somebody else when you can be your true self and be a great and successful person?

Imitating someone else is never a good decision. Because it gets really heard to bear the decision and there comes a time when you get frustrated. Shadowing someone else and their characteristics kills your potential. It makes you feel little about yourself. So why choose that path when you can spend the time to find out your inner self and cultivate the characteristics within you that you want to flourish?

Being true to yourself is all about knowing yourself and maximizing your potential. There are people out there who live a life unaware of the fact that the lives they are living- they don’t even want that. It is one of the worst things that can happen to you. So it is important to know who you are and what you want before you get along with the tides of life and forget yourself. But when you decide to be true to yourself, you can always choose which part of yourself you want to be. It’s all in you- the good, bad and ugly, compassionate, brilliant and selfish, the person who rises above all. You have the capacity to become the best in whichever side you may choose. It depends on you, your choices. You don’t have to imitate a popular person to be popular. You don’t have to try and be like someone you’d always idolized. You can be yourself and be better than the person you are trying to imitate. All you have to do is nourish the qualities in you.

An important part of being true to yourself is deciding which parts of yourself you want to be prominent. You have to be wise in that decision making because, since there are all sorts of potential in you, you don’t want the wrong part to flourish and end up in jail! Jokes apart, but what you choose should be based on what you believe is good because that’s what brings you inner peace.

Being a better person doesn’t include trying to imitate someone better. Being better includes cultivating the qualities you want to cultivate and make the most of them. That’s how you become the true you.

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